Hey everybody my name is Ryan Gromfin. I’m an author, speaker, chef, restaurant owner and I’m the founder of TheRestaurantBoss.com as well as RestaurantProfitandPerformance.com.

Today’s video is something that’s really important because as restaurant owners we get pulled in so many different directions. We all heard the expression, “We’re wearing 17 hats a day”. We’re accountants, we’re lawyers, we’re mechanics, we’re chefs, we’re restaurant managers, we’re mentors or leaders. But we’re also parents, and fathers, and mothers, and sons, and daughters, and cousins, and aunts, and uncles, and we’re all of these things to everybody. Sometimes we just get exhausted at the end of the day. So I want to give you 3 tips on how we can be ‘more’ to more people.

That first tip is Presence.

One of the most important things you can bring to any relationship, to any situation is presence. And I don’t mean a gift (present), I mean presence. I mean, being here 100% with everything you are for that person or that situation. So that means if you’re sitting with your managers in a meeting, you’re 100% present and there with your managers. You’re not thinking about things you have to do tomorrow, or the birthday party that you’re planning for your son or your daughter, or the dinner the date that you’re going out with your wife this evening. It means you’re there and 100% present in the moment.

Now vice versa. If you’re out with your family, with your children, with your parents…that you’re 100% there with them in that moment. If we are not 100% present, everyone around us is going to know it. You’re cheating yourself and you’re cheating others of the joy that you could be having in that moment by not being present—by being in another place. So the first step is to be 100% present in any situation. No matter what that situation is, or no matter who you’re with.

The second tip I want to give you today, is to Practice a Little More Patience.

We’ve all heard the expression patience is a virtue, but it truly is. If we’re not patient in every situation and hearing that situation through – and again being present there – being patient, listening, understanding. It’s going to be very hard for us to be present in that situation because patience itself is the opposite of selfish.

If you’re being impatient then you’re being selfish, because you’re thinking about yourself. You’re putting your needs ahead of the needs of that situation or that person, so then you’re not being present with them. And so again, it goes back to that presence.

But patience is very important to bring to every situation. If you’re listening to a guest complain about something, you have to be patient. You can’t be jumping ahead to what you already know you’re going to say, while they’re sitting there trying to explain to you what happened.

If you’re patient, and you’re listening, and you’re understanding, you could pick up on the gift of that situation rather than just jumping ahead to all the other things that you have to be doing. So patience is that second tip to make sure that you’re being more for everybody in your life and in your restaurant.

Now that third tip I want to give you today is perfection for the moment.

That means that you have to be able to enjoy the perfection and grace of whatever moment you’re in. “How can I more enjoy the perfection and grace of this moment?” is something that I’ve developed through years of personal development, a question I ask myself in many different situations.

But enjoying the perfection of that moment is sometimes difficult but it’s very important to again… to being more, for more people. Because when you’re enjoying the perfection of that particular moment. You’re in it. You’re present. You’re practicing patience. You’re there with them, and they can feel that connection with you.

You’re giving all of yourself to that moment, to that instant, to that joy, whatever it is.

Again I’ll go back to if a customer is complaining or a manager is complaining. If you’re off in another world and you’re thinking oh my god, why do I have to sit here and listen to this? Rather than asking yourself “Why is this perfect right now? What is this person saying to me that I need to be hearing right now?” … you’re not getting everything out of that moment

Let’s look at a personal situation. There’s oftentimes where you make plans with your kids and your family to go see a movie. And then that movie is terrible and you’re angry that you wasted all that time to go see that movie. Instead of asking yourself the question of, “Who cares how bad this movie is? I’m here with my family.” I’m enjoying the time with my family, this moment is perfect for me right now and it’s exactly what my family needs is for us to be together.

If you focus on the things that you can’t control like the quality of the film, or the quality of a dinner that you took your date to, you’re going to always be influenced by others instead of controlling the situation yourself.

So again I know how difficult the restaurant business can be. I know the long hours that we work and I know how hard it is to balance all those different relationships. But I encourage you to work on these 3 tips in every situation that you’re in. In every moment that you’re in, and that is to be present 100% of the time, to practice a little more patience, and to enjoy the perfection of that moment.
I hope you enjoyed today’s video, I look forward to seeing you next week.